And Now, You May Kiss the Robot PDF Print E-mail
Analysis - Commentary
Written by Michael Stuhlreyer   
Thursday, 18 October 2007 18:00

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But that's where the love affair stops. A watchdog buried deep in my brain recognizes irrational gluttony when it sees it and steps in, directing my reasonable self to ponder the damage that eating too many deep-fried, chemical-saturated potatoes can do—even the curled ones, as attractive as they may be. I come to my senses, stop eating, pick the chip remnants from my beard, and refocus attention on the things that really matter in life, like my children and a large glass of ice-cold water.

So when I say I love potato chips, I mean it figuratively. You assume that, right?

But when David Levy, an artificial intelligence researcher at the University of Maastricht in the Netherlands, writes of the human love affair with technology, throw your assumptions out the window, because he is being disturbingly literal.

Granted, Mr. Levy's cognitive abilities could be slightly compromised and he could be excused for an occasional flight of fancy, given Amsterdam's notoriously liberal hashish laws, but a university ranked first in quality of education among all Dutch universities by the Dutch Ministry of Education has awarded him a doctorate on a thesis entitled—get this—"Intimate Relationships with Artificial Partners."

Even if the vast majority of Dutch universities have surrendered to those liberal hashish laws by limiting their degree programs to the study of shiny things or the Wizard of Oz/Dark Side of the Moon phenomenon, a doctoral thesis from any nation's top-ranked university certainly deserves to be seriously contemplated. Right? Then contemplate it I shall. OK...there...done. Finally. Time now to mock it for its utter lunacy.

In "Intimate Relationships with Artificial Partners," now-Doctor Levy theorizes that trends in robotics and shifting attitudes on marriage are likely to result in sophisticated robots that will eventually be seen as suitable marriage partners.

Maybe it's just me being a narrow-minded technophobe, but I'm thinking there is no degree of trending or shifting that will ever result in a sane human marching arm-in-arm with a machine to register at Macy's for flatware.

Levy begs to differ, concluding that human attitudes toward affection, love, and sexuality are just as applicable to human interaction with robots of the future as they are to the relationships between humans today.

Questions abound.

 

  • At what stage of robotic and human evolution will it become acceptable for a guy to look at an automaton from across a crowded room, turn to his buddies, and say, "Would you check out the [censored] on that number?!"
  • When will a teenage girl swoon to the touch of a glorified laptop?
  • Would a human being delusional enough to form a deep emotional connection with a blue-eyed appliance have any friends or family left to attend the nuptials?
  • Would it be considered immoral to cheat on one's robot-spouse with a human?
  • Should the human half of a hybrid couple ever feel obligated to pitch in with household chores, or should he or she just acknowledge the fact that his/her beloved is a tireless android that can (and should) be programmed to never complain?


Time and space are the only limits to the number of derisive, yet legitimate questions I could conjure.

I'm sure there are those even outside the faculty at the University of Maastricht and the opium dens of Amsterdam who are all too eager to buy into Dr. Levy's grotesque and insulting view of the human race. A reasonable person might even point to the new Bionic Woman on NBC and argue that Levy's got a small point, because admittedly this latest iteration of Jamie Sommers is kinda smokin'!

And while I'm more than happy to argue the case with Dr. Levy that Lindsay Wagner (Bionic Woman, circa 1976) is much hotter than this new pretender, I will point out that only a few of the bionic woman's extremities and one eye are robotic. Her heart, mind, and soul—the true essence of Jamie Sommers—remains human, so it's OK to be in love with her...if you're able to move beyond the fact that she's fiction.

I know what you're thinking: What a frivolous argument. Then again, what better to counter the frivolous Dr. Levy? Can I have my doctorate now?

Now, if you'll excuse me, I've got a date with a bag of Lays Sour Cream and Onion.


Michael Stuhlreyer
About the Author:

Michael Stuhlreyer is a business writer and graphic designer specializing in the creation of marketing and sales support materials, as well as articles, case studies, white papers, and product profiles for technology companies. Contact Mike at bizinstruments@comcast.net, or visit his Web site, www.bizinstruments.com.

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Last Updated on Friday, 01 February 2008 04:43
 
Discuss (26 posts)
David Abramowitz
And Now, You May Kiss the Robot
Oct 19 2007 09:06:00
This is not new news. Woody Allen went further than this and devised virtual intimacy fourty years ago!! (See the movie "Sleeper".) Dave
 #145972
H.Boldt
And Now, You May Kiss the Robot
Oct 19 2007 12:10:00
A more appropriate analogy might be that episode of Futurama where Fry fell in love with a robot Lucy Lui. But even in that, there was no suggestion that they would marry. Cheers! Hans
 #145973
frankgw@adelphia.net
And Now, You May Kiss the Robot
Oct 19 2007 12:31:00
Humans as pets? Click below - http://www.reason.com/news/show/122423.html For more information on where humanity may be heading click below - http://www.kurzweilai.net/index.html?flash=1 What do you all think? Where is the ever increasing rate of technological change really taking us? Biotechnology? Nanotechnology? Robotics? Others?
 #145974
scatterload
And Now, You May Kiss the Robot
Oct 19 2007 19:46:00
of course though, fry did not have to worry about leaving a trail of baby-bots all around the country :) -sarge
 #145975
cmatthew
And Now, You May Kiss the Robot
Oct 22 2007 19:55:00
See the movie 'Cherry 2000' for the story. Also, does saying bad words to your PC in frustration count ?
 #145976
And Now, You May Kiss the Robot
Oct 23 2007 01:54:00
I'll have to flip the eight-ball over to get a more definitive answer. The pure natural selection via the physics of liquid-dynamics, for all possible answers to all possible questions. It's never been wrong...and er...or right. But it knows everything. :-)
 #145977
cfuture1
And Now, You May Kiss the Robot
Oct 23 2007 10:19:00
..was a movie that took that theme very seriously. But that movie, along with the less serious Short Circuit, was a platform for un-focusing the idea of what it is to be "human", or a "citizen". (But will they wait for that to virus-the-vote?) With the kind of stuff our modern post-tech media likes to report, it will not be surprising if or when it happens. Remember Hal in 2010? His maker was quite emotionally attached to his buddy there. Glorified blow-up dolls? Yech! Or pumped-up studs? Yech!
 #145978
cfuture1
And Now, You May Kiss the Robot
Oct 23 2007 10:20:00
Remember? With Al Pacino? Baby and all too! Does that one count, since she never had "substance"?
 #145979
frankgw@adelphia.net
And Now, You May Kiss the Robot
Oct 25 2007 09:49:00
"Brief Description of Movie: The Singularity is Near, A True Story about the Future, based on Ray Kurzweil's New York Times best selling book, will be a full-length motion picture slated for theatrical release in Spring 2008. Click below for more information - http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1049412/plotsummary
 #145980
And Now, You May Kiss the Robot
Oct 25 2007 14:45:00
Actually the idea of a Bicentennial Man was a very old one and as I die hard ST-TNG trekkie I would say it was taken from ST-TNG episode "The Measure of a Man" where Mr. Data is on trial to prove that he is a life form and not a machine. The only point that could be against him was that he had no soul. The judge in her verdict debates what soul (a religious concept) is, and states she does not know if she has a "soul" or not. The other point that was often raised against him was that he had no emotions. However when his twin brother Lore was discovered, it was debated if having emotions is a good thing because it were the emotions that made Lore evil and the lack of thereof made Data the righteous one. Also, the idea of "Positronic Brain" was also not new as Mr. Data's brain was also given this very terminology. In the episode "offspring" he constructs another android as "daughter" for himself and tries to duplicate his brain's design in her with tragic results. Agains this concept was discussed. Basically, the idea of Mr. Data can be said to have been inspired by Pinoccio. The major difference, however, was that Mr. Data never tried to be human, just mimic human behavior. In "Deja Q", when he saves Q's life and Q tells him that he is going to have his life long wish granted, Data thinks Q is about to make him human, and politely refused. However to his surprise, Q had a better understanding of him, and had actually granted him a gift of laughter!
 #145981
And Now, You May Kiss the Robot
Oct 25 2007 14:52:00
In Virtuosity, Russel Crowe plays the role of a virtual person like Simone. However unlike Simone, he had concious and manages to get a physical form. ST-TNG again, Professor Moriarty is a hologram and manages to get conciousness. He also manages to get a physical form outside the holodeck only to later appears as a holodeck trick. In reply, the captain plays the same trick and gives Professor the illusion that he has managed to actually get a physical form and have gotten out of holodeck. Only others know he is still in a standalone portion of holodeck. In ST-Voyager however, the hologram Doctor manages to get a "Mobile Holodeck" from far future and got him freedom from the holodeck.
 #145982
David Abramowitz
And Now, You May Kiss the Robot
Oct 25 2007 16:55:00
Hassan.Farooqi wrote: In ST-Voyager however, the hologram Doctor manages to get a "Mobile Holodeck" from far future and got him freedom from the holodeck. Art imitates art - In an episode of "Red Dwarf" Rimmer gets a portable hologram generator, and a further episode gives his hologram substance. Dave
 #145983
And Now, You May Kiss the Robot
Oct 26 2007 12:09:00
"Mr. Data" notwithstanding, Asimov's 1976 short story "The Bicentennial Man" runs the gamut of legal, social, and moral implications of artificial intelligences. His cynical solution,... humans only accept the "robot" as an equal once he accepts "Death" by programming an artificial ageing and infirmity into his "body". (I never saw the Robin Williams movie, so I don't know what their take on it was) We just don't like to be upstaged. Anthropocentricism is a bitch. However, in reality, we will probably end up getting the philosophically inclined thermonuclear "smart" bomb featured in John Carpenter's "Dark Star". We seem to be just smart enough to get ourselves into trouble and little else.
 #145984
And Now, You May Kiss the Robot
Oct 28 2007 13:00:00
I have not read Asimov's "The Bicentennial Man". However it appears that the movie was somewhat based on this novel, not after Mr. Data. Infact some of the inquests of Mr. Data might have been inspired from it. Mr. Data's character is philosophically inclined and attempts to revisit some of the notions humans have about themselves. Especially where we pride in our failings. For example we see out of control emotions as our basic identity and look down on Vulcans (who have emotions fully under control) as "inhuman". How can we evolve if we hold dear our primate mind? Maybe the hatred for logic comes out of the fear of logic. We believe the logic will make us loose our religion. We have invented some counter measures such as "Religious Sciences" to counter science and logic and I now see "Faith Based Movies" on Sci-Fi channel. What the heck is going on? :) I have now switched to History Channel!!!
 #145985
frankgw@adelphia.net
And Now, You May Kiss the Robot
Oct 29 2007 11:48:00
"How can we evolve if we hold dear our primate mind?" Below is a website that helps to put religions in perspective – http://www.rationalresponders.com/religion_and_false_anthropocentricism
 #145986
And Now, You May Kiss the Robot
Oct 29 2007 13:33:00
With all due respect, I think the website went to the other extreme. This website seems to be against traditional religions only. I do not consider it to be rational to bash traditional religions and leave alone other ideologies for which there is no dialogue e.g. patrioticism, nationalism, racism, secterianism, capitalism, communism, and even atheism. People actually fight, kill, and die for them without rationale. They all qualify as religion.
 #145987
frankgw@adelphia.net
And Now, You May Kiss the Robot
Nov 01 2007 10:48:00
"No species has had the ability to direct its own evolutionary course - until now." Click below - http://www.discoverychannel.ca/shows/showdetails.aspx?sid=4399 "Since the beginning of life on Earth, evolution has been dictated by Charles Darwin's theory of natural selection. And now, humanity is on the brink of a change so radical, so rapid and unlike any other stage in human history."
 #145988
And Now, You May Kiss the Robot
Nov 01 2007 12:01:00
The problem with Richard A. Clarke's futuristic novel "Breakpoint: terrorists vs. transhumanists " is that it happens in 2012. The problem is, if we are to believe all the pre-biblic doomsday prophecies like the 6000 year old Mayan Calendar and equivalently old Chinese iChing Calendar, the world is going to end of 21st December 2012. History channel has come with a more rational explaination is that every 13000 years or so the earth changes its magnetic poles and with it the position of the stars. Since the clanedars are based on stars, the calendars end, not the world. However with the change of magnetic poles, the glaciers would melt and a new begining of ICE age will start and we will end up like Atlantis. So we would problably end up as abominable snowmen instead of pets for super intelligent androids.
 #145989
David Abramowitz
And Now, You May Kiss the Robot
Nov 01 2007 14:57:00
I saw a PBS show on magnetic pole reversal about a year ago. One of the scariest scenarios I have ever seen. Perhaps the most pessimistic prophecy was the inability of anyone to do anything about it! Dave
 #145990
And Now, You May Kiss the Robot
Nov 02 2007 09:16:00
I am glad you watch PBS. Smart people watch channels like PBS, C-Span, History Channel, Free Speech Channel, or Document Channel ... not faith-based channels like CNN or Fox (and now add sci-fi to that) :) History Channel has a series "Mega Disasters" which my 11 year old watches with great enthusiasm. For any of these disaster, there is nothing we can do but just end e.g. GRB (Gamma Radiation Burst), Meteoride crash (Like Schumaker-Lavi which could have ended us in 1994 if Jupiter had not pulled it), Methane Explotion, etc etc. Yesterday they talked about a mega drought that can destroy the USA like it almost did in the 30's. Except that in the 30's the farmers were not sucking so much water from the great underwater lake that connects all American lakes.
 #145991
frankgw@adelphia.net
And Now, You May Kiss the Robot
Nov 05 2007 11:50:00
"Aubrey de Grey ... argues that some people alive today will live in a robust and youthful fashion for 1,000 years." Click below for the complete article - http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2007/10/30/AR2007103002222_pf.html Click below for information on his new book - http://www.amazon.com/Ending-Aging-Rejuvenation-Breakthroughs-Lifetime/dp/0312367066/ref=pd_bbs_sr_1/103-8709915-0735837?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1194274707&sr=8-1
 #145992
David Abramowitz
And Now, You May Kiss the Robot
Nov 05 2007 12:10:00
You just reminded me of Ira Gershwin's comment about Methusalah in "Porgy and Bess." I won't repeat it here, but it might be germaine. Dave
 #145993
frankgw@adelphia.net
And Now, You May Kiss the Robot
Nov 14 2007 10:14:00
"Earlier this year the government of South Korea said it was drawing up a code of ethics to prevent human abuse of robots-and vice versa." "The new charter is part of an effort to establish ground rules for human interaction with robots in the future." For the full article, click below - http://www.networkworld.com/community/node/21867
 #145994
peapod
And Now, You May Kiss the Robot
Nov 14 2007 13:34:00
See this for the video
 #145995
frankgw@adelphia.net
And Now, You May Kiss the Robot
Nov 20 2007 14:08:00
A near-human virtual teacher called Eve can tell if a child is frustrated, angry or confused by an on-screen teaching session and can adapt the tutoring session appropriately. Click below for the complete article - http://physorg.com/news114704050.html
 #145996
There are too many comments to list them all here. See the forum for the full discussion.
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