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  • Licensed Time Wasters

    ** This thread discusses the article: Licensed Time Wasters **
    ** This thread discusses the Content article: Licensed Time Wasters **
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  • #2
    Licensed Time Wasters

    ** This thread discusses the article: Licensed Time Wasters **
    I really feel sorry for Joel. Of all the things to comment on, he's obviously spent too much time alone and in Canada. There has to be a better use of your e-mail than this dribble called an article.

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    • #3
      Licensed Time Wasters

      ** This thread discusses the article: Licensed Time Wasters **
      In Canada, if a law suit is filed, the judge does not give a damn to the fine print and consider what a common person understands. This is the definition of law as passed on to Canada by the British. "Law is common sense". So what makes sense is Law. For this reason the employment form in Canada would be no more than one page long asking for name, address, qualification, experience, references etc. In the USA, when I first applied for a job in a fortune 500 company (no mama papa shop), I was give a huge pile of papers to read and sign. A Canadian would just call it BS as it was nothing but general understanding. However I had to sign because the IT department requested that they had no authority over these miserable HR people. HR people had to apologize that it had to do with compliance department and compliance blamed it on law, government, trial lawyers etc etc. Back in 1983 when I first installed Frank Borland's "Side Kick", I not only loved the product, I also loved the license agreement. It was called "No nonsense license agreement". The wordings were something like this ... "This software is like a book. Just like you are not supposed to photocopy it from your friend, you can not copy it. You can not rent it out or resell it without publisher's permission etc etc".

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      • #4
        Licensed Time Wasters

        ** This thread discusses the article: Licensed Time Wasters **
        Do you really get paid to rant like this? I gotta see if I can shake that tree.

        Not only all of what you said, Joel, but what really pisses me off is when they stuff the legalese the length of a short novel into a scrollable 2x3 inch window. You click & hold the down arrow on the vertical scrollbar and the thingy you can click & drag to move the text up & down doesn't move for two minutes! I mean, some of the words have a hard time fitting on one line! If you Select-All and paste it into a Word document, the result is 20 pages of single-spaced text! This is the clearest signal to me that they really don't want you to read the license agreement.

        Register software? Lie through your teeth! Use bogus name and address, and use a throw-away email address that you never use but for this purpose (in case they email you something that you *need* to use the product). Here's my address and phone number, should anyone feel the need to "contact" me: 123 Leavemealone St Justgoaway, MI 48000 Phone number: 989-555-1212

        I also make a million dollars (US) per year, drive Porsches, and enjoy gardening, bowling, flying kites with border collies, cheese fondue parties, and surfing for porn that involves vegetables. I can't imagine what kind of marketing profile that would generate.

        Joel, I'm surprised. You're a marketing guy, right? You should *want* to be contacted and prodded for personal information so that your needs can be catered to. After all, marketing is all about giving us what we really want!

        BTW, my all-time favorite Dave Barry columns are the ones he did on telemarketers a few years back: Ask not what telemarketers can do to you So what's their hang-up? (archived column)

        Go ahead, call me.

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        • #5
          Licensed Time Wasters

          ** This thread discusses the article: Licensed Time Wasters **
          It sounds like the world needs more Frank Borlands.

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          • #6
            Licensed Time Wasters

            ** This thread discusses the article: Licensed Time Wasters **
            Do you really get paid to rant like this? I gotta see if I can shake that tree.
            You mean writers get paid? I wish I'd known that when I offered my columns to MC Press. Just kidding. Yes they pay me a little dough to rant like this. Now if I could just convince them to pay me in hard currency rather than dough I might really have something.
            Joel, I'm surprised. You're a marketing guy, right? You should *want* to be contacted and prodded for personal information so that your needs can be catered to. After all, marketing is all about giving us what we really want!
            Just because I do this stuff for a living doesn't mean that I want it done to me. What kind of a fool do you take me for? Please don't answer that question.
            Go ahead, call me.
            Funny, for some reason the number you gave doesn't work. You'd better call the phone company and have them look into that.

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            • #7
              Licensed Time Wasters

              ** This thread discusses the article: Licensed Time Wasters **
              There has to be a better use of your e-mail than this dribble called an article.
              Don't be shy. Tell me what you really thought of the article. I can take it. Did you like it or not?

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              • #8
                Licensed Time Wasters

                ** This thread discusses the article: Licensed Time Wasters **
                ...now, really... a "second tongue and a third eye" might be interesting!

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                • #9
                  Licensed Time Wasters

                  ** This thread discusses the article: Licensed Time Wasters **
                  "repugnant little company"? "meddlesome little vermin"? "miserable wares"? Someone needs a soothing cup of herb tea! Might I suggest a day or two at a spa or resort of your choosing? Yup, those license agreements! Most of them are just dreadfully dull, however. And they are typically the result of lawyers having sway over the company, which sees no real downside to boring their customers. They know that most people click on "I Agree" and never read the boilerplate legalese. The vendors want the equivalent of a Get Out Of Jail Free card in case things ever get nasty. The real dangerous ones are engineered to give the vendor a blatantly unfair advantage over their customers. These agreements say things like "we have the right to retroactively change this agreement" and "we do not have to notify you of any such changes". Also, most licenses limit any damages due to faulty software to the cost of the software. Vendors are still getting off too lightly in terms of their responsibilities to their customers. Even so, I would recommend watching those sugar levels!

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                  • #10
                    Licensed Time Wasters

                    ** This thread discusses the article: Licensed Time Wasters **
                    Back in the days of DOS I purchased a copy of HavenTree Software's flow charting tool. It came with a simple, easy to understand license agreement four or five paragraphs in length. I believe the company is now defunct, but the verbiage of that agreement can still be found on the net. Just Google "Bloodthirsty License Agreement". That's my idea of user friendly. P.S. I think the company was a Canadian business.

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                    • #11
                      Licensed Time Wasters

                      ** This thread discusses the article: Licensed Time Wasters **
                      Thanks! I took your suggestion and Googled it. Now that's what I call a license agreement! Why can't every software company use licenses like that? Of course, there'd be a lot of lawyers looking for jobs.

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                      • #12
                        Licensed Time Wasters

                        ** This thread discusses the article: Licensed Time Wasters **
                        Glad you liked it! Keep those rants coming. They are one of the highlights of my week.

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                        • #13
                          Licensed Time Wasters

                          ** This thread discusses the article: Licensed Time Wasters **
                          Keep those rants coming. They are one of the highlights of my week.
                          Thanks so much. I take that as a great compliment. Then again, you didn't say so it could be just that most of the rest of your week is incredibly boring and my columns rise very slightly above that level. But, for the benefit of my ego, I'm going to stick with the compliment theory until I see evidence to the contrary. Thanks again.

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                          • #14
                            Licensed Time Wasters

                            ** This thread discusses the article: Licensed Time Wasters **
                            No one, and I mean no one, can top the "sotred outside the country" clause in a TrendMicro Software license agreement and I quote: 3. Product Registration. By accepting this Agreement, You agree to register Your Software as a condition of Your trial use of the Software and Your right to Maintenance during the Evaluation Term, and consent to having certain limited personal data stored outside the country where You are located and/or in jurisdictions where privacy laws may not be as stringent as those in your own country.

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