Internet Job Postings -- Read 'em for a good Laugh

Internet Job Postings -- Read 'em for a good Laugh

I don't know, the ones I'm working with seem to have their senses of humor intact (must be a glitch). They were recently contemplating asking the driver of a certain yellow delivery truck (our competitor) for ice cream and treats at lunch time (implying that it looks like an ice cream truck!).

[M.Savino]

Internet Job Postings -- Read 'em for a good Laugh

I've been an FTE for two years but until then, I had been an independent for about 10. I had searches set up on the Job Boards which would email me potential positions. I never shut them off, so I still receive AS400 and JD Edwards positions from Monster on a weekly basis. Today, I read one that was so poorly written, I actually "Applied" for the job. But instead of copy and pasting my resume into the Text Box that's intended for that purpose, I complained about the quality of the Post. I pointed out that by merely pasting the text of the Posting into a Word Processor, multiple spelling and grammatical errors were found. I also added that the rhetoric about going the extra mile wasn't very credible in that context..... Sure hope I'm not desperate for a job anytime soon. But this isn’t an isolated case. Many postings start out with a vision statement that always mentions Quality, Diversity and Compliance. That’s usually followed by a long list of Competencies. In our case this often includes things like the ability to sit through half day meetings without using the Rest rooms and sometimes pencil sharpening skills. Then you end up with a Job Description that goes something like this: Sr. P/A with 10+ years experience. Must have excellent orel and written communications. Looking for self-starter who can finish. Proficiency in RPG IV required, RPG 5 a big plus. So much for Quality. And if they’re going to Comply with anything, why not start with Webster’s. Bad spelling, poor grammar, incomplete sentences and desired skills that don’t even exist (at least not yet). So does corporate America just not care? Do they think that the average IT professional looking for a job is that desperate? Or has the quality of education sunk so low, that this is the best we can expect? It would be funny, if it wasn’t for the fact that the person who wrote this ad could be the gatekeeper who decides whether or not we’re qualified enough to be presented to the hiring manager. I can just picture the phone interview with HR: "Sorry Mike, we’d like to bring you in for an interview but all the other applicants have at least 2 years experience with RPG 5." "I understand sir, but could I just point out that there is NO @#!$& RPG " click.... "Hello??" Time to start boning up on Visual Basic VIII I guess.

Internet Job Postings -- Read 'em for a good Laugh

David, I like the comedy channel better! ;-) chuck Opinions expressed are not necessarily those of my employer. "David Abramowitz" wrote in message news:6b164678.55@WebX.WawyahGHajS... > The joke (for those who don't get it) is that MS will charge you for an "Upgrade" to fix the problems that its software caused in the first place. > > The punchline is that the public pays the fee! > > Dave

[David Abramowitz]

Internet Job Postings -- Read 'em for a good Laugh

The joke (for those who don't get it) is that MS will charge you for an "Upgrade" to fix the problems that its software caused in the first place. The punchline is that the public pays the fee! Dave

Internet Job Postings -- Read 'em for a good Laugh

Chris, No need to prove that we don't have a sense of humor, we get the point! ;-) chuck Opinions expressed are not necessarily those of my employer. "Chris Ringer" wrote in message news:6b164678.53@WebX.WawyahGHajS... > Yes, I laugh every time my Windoze PC locks up or an application dies or won't run because of a memory leak or security is breached. I just chuckle and think "those darned Microsoft rascals got me again". > > Chris

Internet Job Postings -- Read 'em for a good Laugh

Yes, I laugh every time my Windoze PC locks up or an application dies or won't run because of a memory leak or security is breached. I just chuckle and think "those darned Microsoft rascals got me again". Chris

[David Abramowitz]

Internet Job Postings -- Read 'em for a good Laugh

I really resent this. Anyone thinking that individuals in this field have no sense of humor, need only to look at the software that is produced. Even entire companies have a great sense of humor. Microsoft has been playing a practical joke on the entire world for years! Dave

[M.Savino]

Internet Job Postings -- Read 'em for a good Laugh

I think we have the definitive answer from the renowned Humortologists Ringer and Klebanoff. After 20 years of working with Techies, how could I have missed the symptoms? But Doctors.... I'd like to propose a radical treatment. As soon as I find a Donor, I'm going to attempt a Transplant. I sure hope that the Anatomy of a Techie is similar to a Human Being's. Scalpel....

Internet Job Postings -- Read 'em for a good Laugh

It's just a mundane medical term. No one should take offense to it -- unless you know someone first hand that's had it removed, then it may be personal.

[J.Klebanoff]

Internet Job Postings -- Read 'em for a good Laugh

Are we allowed to use that word in mixed company?

Internet Job Postings -- Read 'em for a good Laugh

You're referring of course to a humorectomy.

[J.Klebanoff]

Internet Job Postings -- Read 'em for a good Laugh

EDIguru said:

you can't get a laugh out of this thread at all apparently.

It is a proven and well documented fact that techies are selected at birth and have their senses of humor removed to ensure that they will not be distracted by the absurdities of life.

Internet Job Postings -- Read 'em for a good Laugh

Agreed. Lest you be considered a forum sniper! ;-) chuck Opinions expressed are not necessarily those of my employer. "dave400" wrote in message news:6b164678.45@WebX.WawyahGHajS... > Dont let the Forum sniper shoot you down. > > Seems these days you need to put a Humour indicator on a posting.

[dmjae2004@yahoo.com]

Internet Job Postings -- Read 'em for a good Laugh

Dont let the Forum sniper shoot you down. Seems these days you need to put a Humour indicator on a posting.

[dacust]

Internet Job Postings -- Read 'em for a good Laugh

I also liked your post. And your rose always brightens up the room.